by Danielle Wright
“Men who cannot meet the standard will attack the standard.” – Lisa K. Stephenson
There is a select group of men who simply refuse to evolve. They see women surpassing them emotionally, mentally, and financially, and instead of stepping up to the challenge, they prefer to criticize the players or attach themselves to one. Men who take women for granted are only doing what they feel entitled to do. Believe it or not, we are all sold a dream during childhood — for women, it’s that we'll find a great man to marry and have beautiful children one day.
Every Disney story shows us a princess in need of saving, who is then rescued by her prince charming, and they go off to live happily ever after. Men, on the other hand, are taught to believe that they will have access to a plethora of women and resources — however, the two are not in tandem. In other words, men know that they do not need resources to have women; simply, they need to find and bed as many women as possible before a certain age.
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As the years go by and more women become aware that most men will never amount to anything, and that those with little to no resources are the most problematic, they are slowly turning away from relationships and dating altogether. Men who pursue resources typically do not have a bad history with women, whereas those who do the opposite are usually leeches, the ones women find themselves having to deal with on a daily basis. These men are not mentally sound, articulate, and lack financial stability. All of these factors together lead to a grumpy and entitled boy who will do everything to drain you of your happiness.
Men with means are elusive. The places to find them are usually where they can unwind, socialize with like-minded people, and enjoy the weather. They want to see their hard work pay off. They are not swarming around on dating apps or spending their free time scrolling through social media; no, they do not have the time and would consider that a waste of time when they could be doing something to either earn more money or elevate their social status.
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Your social status is always going to be your greatest achievement in this world. Relationships and introductions are key to finding quality people who are less likely to take you for granted. This is because it takes hard work to acquire a good social status that will boost your image among key players in your social circle. Men who work hard know that they have more to lose and are less likely (though not impossible) to be belligerent, abusive, and take your contributions to their life lightly.
A stay-at-home mom or wife grants her husband the ability to perform well at his job because she is at home raising the children. This is something he cannot take lightly because her contribution to his success allows him both resources and a legacy. Women who find themselves in the position of being taken for granted should do one thing: leave. Men do not value women who:
BUILD THEM UP
Never build up a man; it's the fastest way for them to lose respect for you and take you for granted. You may want to believe that men have it hard in life, but the truth is, they look out for one another. Men are more loyal to one another than women are to other women due to having a societal trauma bond. They bond over the fact that they are pressured to be providers and selfless when they are in relationships or seeking one.
Therefore, the moment they meet a woman while at their lowest and she stands in her masculine energy, placing him in a feminine role, he will never feel satisfied. He will want to prove to himself that he can be the man society says he should be without the help of a woman who society also says he should be able to care for. It’s embarrassing and emasculating. So when you allow a man to use you as a stepping stool, just remember, he is not coming back down for you. You will only be a reminder of his past failures.
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BEHAVE AGGRESSIVELY
Never argue with a man. Set your standards so high that men without resources will think twice before approaching you. Men negotiate; it’s their thing, it’s what they do. The barter system has been around for ages. So, when you allow yourself to be traded for hope, you only have yourself to blame. If he can have you at his lowest and you’re complacent with it—not allowing him the space to grow and show you that he is the man he should be, then you’re setting yourself up to be used. Men do not respond to threats from women or aggressive behavior because to them you’re expendable.
ARE UNINTELLIGENT
No man wants a dummy. You have to be able to play the role of the neck when you’re in a relationship with a man to avoid being taken for granted. He is the head, you are the neck; the head does not move without the neck. That is all. Your function is to uplift, encourage, appreciate, and admire him for his hard work. But only if and when he deserves it. Men begin taking women for granted when she’s praising him for actions he deserves no reward for.
Why are you cooking him meals when he did not provide the food? Why are you having sex with him when he is not taking care of you? Why are you loyal to him when he has shown himself to be committed to you and only you? Why are you having his children when he has not provided a place for you to raise them? You are not unintelligent, and the places and rooms he envisions himself in one day will not accept someone like you.
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ALLOW THEMSELVES TO BE A WILLING PARTICIPANT
You cannot allow yourself to be used and then complain about it. You will either get up and walk away or stay and be quiet. There is no in-between. Telling a man he is taking you for granted when he is well aware that he is and deliberately choosing to allow him to continue to do it is foolish. Women like to joke around and say that men know their worth, but this is true.
What a woman will tolerate, the average man will not. He will leave, and this causes us to view men as being more valuable and not being expendable, but it is the opposite for women. If the majority of women are known for staying with their abusers and cheaters, then it will be expected for men to believe women are cheap and devalue every woman he meets until she proves herself to be a rare cut diamond. One he will cherish until the day he dies.
The way to treat a man who is taking you for granted is to remove yourself from his life. Access denied.