Have you ever caught yourself daydreaming of that perfect person? You know, the one who knows you even better than you know yourself – the guy who shows up randomly with the much-needed box of chocolates and wine, the one who brushes your hair until you fall asleep, the one who uses his knight-and-saving armor or whatever to protect you from the dangers of the world?
We all seem to be in search of the seemingly ethereal concept of a soulmate. But here’s a thought, do they even exist? And if they do, how the hell are you supposed to find yours out of the 9 billion people on Earth? This is something I have mulled over time and time again over the years. My opinions on the concept may seem weird to you. You might not buy it. But, let’s give it a go.
Attracting Your Soulmate:
Firstly, I don’t think every person on the planet needs a soulmate. My thoughts on this all stem from an idea of people being capable of needing and receiving at a certain level. I’m a deep person – some argue that I may be too deep for my own good. Whatever the thought on it all, I feel as if I’m always teetering on that line of being intriguingly quirky and the type of bizarre that scares people away. (I’m telling you this for a reason.) I have always felt that there are people, souls, spirits, or whatever that I resonate with on this intangible level. When I meet these people, I get filled with an instant sense of completion.
I’ve explained this phenomenon to friends, and some have said, “Wow. I have never felt that.” Some had felt it, though. But, see, I didn’t know what to do with all of this at first. Some of these experiences were with women and some were with men. And with the men, they weren’t always men I felt an attraction towards or if I did it ended up in blasphemy – which leads me to the next point, we often think of soulmates as lovers, as a recognition of a kindred spirit. The belief is that these instances would then blossom into beautiful friendships and ultimately, to marriage.
But what I have learned throughout the years is that soulmates are everywhere and in many, many forms. If I had to guess, we likely have quite a few people floating around this planet who could fit the part of a soulmate in your life. The problem isn’t finding them. It’s being able to connect with your highest self, and most importantly, your inner need for this person and then recognize that connection in someone else.
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The one thing that experts suggest is to practice opening your heart past its current boundaries. The Buddhists have excellent teachings on stretching and growing the heart to accept all that comes your way. For a person to find their soulmate, some people have to crave a deep connection on a visceral level. This ultimately means that we need to find people who are open to the same sort of thing we are. It does take two to tango, right? But how do we do this? Which steps will lead you to the correct path towards finding your happily ever after?
The answer might not be what you want to hear, but it’s probably as simple as it comes - every choice you make helps the Universe lead you into the relationship of your dreams. The “real” goal as you manifest your soulmate is to prepare yourself to receive that which the Universe has already created for you. When you nurture yourself by working on the deeper issues of forgiveness, appreciation, intention, and openness, you make room for magic to occur by allowing space for the Universe to hear your call. Knowing that your soulmate is on their way, you need to make room in your life and your heart for them.
One of the most powerful processes you can do for self-care and positive manifestation is to forgive and release all that has come before. What you resist persists. Forgive the past loves who have hurt you. More importantly, you must forgive your past self for poor judgment, poor choices in relationships, or anything you have done to cause harm. Your past has shaped you; your relationships have shaped you; your loves have shaped you, and your mistakes have shaped you - but they don't own you.
It is entirely natural to want to have a fulfilling relationship with your soulmate and experience love in that fashion. But when manifesting your soulmate, it is essential to fall in love with yourself first! You are as deserving of your love as your soulmate is. Loving yourself well and falling in love with who you are breeds confidence.
That confidence is deeply attractive to everyone in your life, and it will be especially attractive to your soulmate when they arrive. Learn to appreciate all your positive aspects, talents, and gifts. Send them your love and gratitude. But also allow yourself to focus on things that you don’t like about yourself or would like to grow or change. You are going to send these areas love and light. Instead of resentment, how can you find and grow a sense of love for these areas? Loving your past challenges, resentments, and dislikes are where you can affect the quickest changes in your life.
Find the person you resonate with. The person who is just as open as you are. The person you not only like. The person you’re not only attracted to. But the person you inexplicably connect with. Be patient, be open, be kind, but above all, let love come to you.
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