African American couples go through a lot, whether it is dealing with stresses and emotions, or the pressures of race in our society. Through love, marriage, single life, and advice on keeping your relationship solid, these ten relationship books could help you reach solid ground with your mate. Whether you’re having trouble in your relationship or you just want to learn more about each other, these books could open your mind and your heart.
“The current divorce rates for black couples have quadrupled since 1960 and is now double that of the general population, rates of domestic violence in black marriages are skyrocketing, and nearly half of married black men admit to having been unfaithful.”
This book centers on black relationships sociologically, unpacking black history, and how it has affected black relationships today. “The challenge of mending the rift between black men and women is formidable but can be made easier. Understanding is the first step on the path to healing.”
It's Complicated (But It Doesn't Have to Be): A Modern Guide to Finding and Keeping Love by Paul Brunson
“I first thought about how I could present subjects that resonated with both women and men.” This publication, while aimed towards men, is for everybody. Brunson wrote the book for his son, aiming to produce as a relationship book that is real, to the point, and for everyone. This piece is not only for men, but it aims to be a sort of overarching trove of knowledge, perfect for understanding your partner.
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This book is described as, “an essential and insightful guide that’s filled with a wealth of true accounts and advice to assist African-American couples in dealing with the pressures and adjustments of marriage and rejuvenating the love, passion, happiness, and intimacy of marriage to make it last forever.” It focuses on personal stories and advice from real couples and can provide a realistic and varying view of relationships.
The work, written by “a real-life Carrie Bradshaw” answers the deepest darkest questions you’ve ever asked yourself - “Are you stressed about meeting “the one,” getting “the ring,” and exchanging “I dos” at the altar? Do you feel frustrated by the seeming lack of relationship-worthy guys? Would you date yourself right now?”
Demetria Lucas’ book is about the single life, but also relationship readiness, with anecdotes and opinions of Lucas’, “Male Mind Squad—a committee of thirty men from varying backgrounds who answer the tough questions about sex, dating, and relationships.”
“In this provocative rethinking of the African American woman's experience, Brenda Lane Richardson and Dr. Brenda Wade ask their black American sisters to consider this question: ‘What lessons about love and intimacy were passed down from your foremothers to you?’” This book explores the legacy of the emotional impact caused by black history, and how black women can uplift themselves with the acknowledgment of pain, history, and inheritance.
“The soul sometimes speaks the loudest amid life’s turmoil. Baring one’s heart through the process of self-discovery can awaken the gifts within. The Awakening is a collection of poems that bare emotions of love, growth, and self-worth through teen motherhood, marriage, and divorce.”
Though this work is not centered on “help,” its strength, emotion, and self-discovery can expose things in ourselves we did not understand before. This piece is, “full of heartfelt emotion and creative flair. There is healing in these words. The restoration will be swift.”
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“In this New York Times bestseller, Hollywood’s power couple DeVon Franklin and Meagan Good candidly share their courtship and marriage, and the key to their success—waiting.” “Waiting” is all about learning that we must wait patiently for “the one” to come into our lives, and Devon and Meagan have learned this firsthand. The couple crossed paths multiple times until they finally sparked their romance on the set of a movie. “DeVon and Meagan chose to do something almost unheard of in today’s society—abstain from sex until they were married.”
“In Becoming Married, Staying Married, couples will be encouraged to see marriage as a process that never ends. Together they will reflect on current realities particular to African American couples.”
This book centers around 9 principals that every couple needs for a healthy marriage and is useful in any stage of a relationship. This piece also includes, “suggestions on how to further enhance each quality are included, in addition to African proverbs and biblical Scripture that relate to marriage.”
“According to Steve, it's because they're asking other women for advice when they should be going directly to the source.” Claiming the title as a number one bestseller, this book is a direct portal into the mind of a man who has much to share with women about relationships. In his expanded edition, “Steve includes an added section of all new advice, with tips on dealing with your partner's exes, spicing up your relationship, ensuring you're ready for that walk down the aisle and much more.”
This book told with alternating voices and written by Shirlee and Harold Haizlip depicts their love, marriage, and fight for racial equality. Both Harold and Shirlee explain “with an unwavering commitment to each other, their families, and their race, what hard work, good luck, and most important, unshakable love can accomplish.” Though this one is also not a book centered on advice, it depicts love and experience that is real, tangible, and steady.
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Though no book is the authority on all things love, we hope that these ten publications can help you understand yourself, your partner, and your relationship. Happy reading.