How Burnout Is Affecting Romantic Connections in Millennials and Gen Z

It’s 2025, and gig work is at an all-time high, with many Millennials (born between 1981 and 1996) and Gen Z (born between 1997 and 2012) picking up extra shifts or pursuing side hustles. For those who didn’t launch content creation careers on TikTok during the pandemic, platforms like Uber and Lyft are often the top choices, leading many to work unpredictable hours just to make ends meet.

As the documentary UberLand highlights, “Uber is taking advantage of the declining condition of working people.” One protester pointed out, “They make it seem like Uber drivers are making all this money, when in reality they’re making less than minimum wage.” Author and serial entrepreneur Lisa K. Stephenson echoed this sentiment in a tweet on X, stating: “Uber drivers are marketed as independent contractors. You all should be setting your own hours and pricing, and Uber should take a percentage of what you charge. Y’all are getting used in the worst way!”

With Uber and Lyft controlling ride prices, concerns about corporate greed and exploitation have grown. The introduction of congestion pricing in NYC has incentivized more people to take trains or rideshares. Meanwhile, rising fares and unsafe subway conditions further push working-class citizens toward becoming customers for these apps.

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Adding to the issue, massive layoffs continue to occur yearly, leaving many without stable employment. This pattern seems too coordinated to be a coincidence: fire workers, funnel them into gig work, increase fares, and make alternative options like public transit less safe or desirable. But how does this affect relationships? Since taking office, President Trump has signed a record-breaking number of executive orders, many of which threaten women’s rights regarding abortion and healthcare. Families are left wondering: how are they supposed to survive when stable jobs are scarce, and gig work is just a facade for corporate greed?

Perhaps it was never about surviving—but about scaring people into poverty. Both Millennials and Gen Z have struggled with purchasing homes, job security, financial stability, and more, making burnout seem almost inevitable. Coupled with the growing discourse online suggesting that many women are only interested in dating and mating with men who have financial means, we seem to face a significant problem. Romantic connections are no longer at the forefront of desire—or even a priority—for many, as survival has quickly taken precedence.

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Men need money, women need stability—so where does it all come from? Encouraging women to take pride in their appearance is one thing, but even if a woman has done the "outer work," is there a man within her proximity who can meet her financial and emotional needs? Perhaps the answer is no, which is why many women refuse to settle, believing they are out of the leagues of the men they encounter. If everyone is chasing the same man—rich, tall, and handsome—then repopulation as a whole could be in jeopardy.

This raises the question: do women need to be "reprogrammed" and influenced in their decision-making, as men have done for centuries? It’s clear that when women are left to their own devices, birth rates continue to decline. Yes, marriage is often criticized as a sham, and the traditional "wife" role we were sold as young girls might very well be a cover for a larger, nefarious plot to secure free labor from women. But if the patriarchy hadn’t convinced us that marriage and procreation were essential, would you even be here?

Consider this: what if your mother had decided she needed to wait for the "perfect man" before giving birth to you? Would you still think it’s fair to have such high expectations for romantic partners—expectations that, in this economy, many of us can’t meet ourselves? No one should have to settle, but we should all strive for understanding in light of our current economic climate. It’s not impossible to live within or below your means and allow money to flow freely to you.

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Destitute people cannot attract money because money does not stay where it is not valued. In other words, if you’re like me and have a good handle on astrology, you know that the law of attraction applies to finances as well. We often ask the question, “Why do rich people hoard their wealth?” The answer is simple: to keep more wealth coming in. If someone were to give you $100 and you spent it within ten minutes, do you believe that money would continue to flow freely to you?The answer is no.

Many people who cling to gig work or avoid romantic connections out of fear of being “used” or not finding a partner willing to spoil them are energetically keeping themselves single and poor. A clear example of this dynamic is the Black dollar, which averages about $1.9 trillion annually. Yet, there has never been an African American woman to take a company public (IPO), and Black Americans essentially own little of significant value in this country—no third places, no industries, no substantial assets.

Where does the money go? Black men who enter high-earning fields like the NBA and NFL are often conditioned to date lighter-skinned or White women to increase their social currency. In marriages, according to patriarchal norms, the woman typically controls the household finances. Consequently, wealth earned by Black men often funnels back into White communities. White women, understandably, do not spend their husbands’ money in Black and Brown communities—it doesn’t benefit them to do so.

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Burnout is also affecting how Millennials and Gen Z approach romantic connections. The constant discourse online is no surprise, given that algorithms push divisive relationship advice to drive engagement. This enables more people to create similar content, perpetuating the cycle. It’s all a game, and we’re just pieces on the board.

So, what is the solution? We need to take a long, hard look at ourselves and be realistic when it comes to dating, choosing a mate, and building a life together. Does that person have ambition? Not the kind of ambition that leads them to become Uber/Lyft drivers, nor the kind that drives them to pour thousands of dollars into a delusional startup idea while their partner is expecting their first child. Instead, do they have the ambition to make their voice heard through meaningful actions?

Are they showing up to vote, protesting, organizing, speaking to the youth in schools, or being active in their community? Are they taking online courses to earn certifications or attending trade school to become the only mechanic, plumber, or electrician in their neighborhood? We need to start thinking outside the box if we want to succeed and make our romantic connections last like they used to. Otherwise, we’ll keep punishing each other while allowing the real culprits to maintain their dictatorship unscathed.

by Harley Miller