Will I Ever Get Married?

Knowing whether you will ever get married is a question that many people ask themselves because getting married is a big decision to make. Additionally, marriage can bring a lot of happiness to a person’s life - but it can also put a lot of pressure on people to find the one. Whether you are ready to take the plunge or are single and wondering about the building blocks to a healthy relationship, here are 16 ways to know “Will I ever get married?”

YOU LOVE YOURSELF:
You must have the self-confidence to ensure that you end up in a healthy and well-balanced relationship. If you don’t love yourself, you can’t expect someone else to love you in the respectful way that you deserve. Sure, you can ask for your partner's support when you're upset, but as marriage coach Lesli Doares says, "Being married is about joining two lives together, not giving up one. Being content in your skin means you won't be looking to your partner to fill voids in your life." With that in mind, love yourself before you’re ready to love anyone else.

YOU BELIEVE IN MARRIAGE:
Perhaps one of the single biggest reasons to know whether you will ever get married or not is knowing whether you believe in marriage in the first place. More so is knowing if you want to walk down the aisle with someone one day. Much like wanting to get married, you need to believe in the idea of marriage for it to be an option for you. If you don’t, then the likelihood of you ending up with someone in a marriage is much more diminished than if you do want to get married in the future.

Marriage is not for everyone, and difficulties may arise if your partner believes in marriage, yet you don’t. This may be a difference of opinion that you need to talk through so that you can both be happy in your relationship.

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YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT IN A PARTNER:
When looking into the idea of getting married, one of the ways of knowing if it will happen for you is whether you know what you want in a life partner or not. If you do know what you want, that is a good step towards finding the person you want to spend your future with. If not, this is the perfect time to consider what qualities strike you well in a person.

YOU NO LONGER WANT TO JUST DATE/BE SINGLE:
Knowing whether you will get hitched or not is also dependent on how you feel about dating at the moment. At some point in people’s lives they are very happy to be single. Being single can be a lot of fun and it affords a person a lot of freedom. You can do what you want when you want, and you don’t have to think about what your actions do for your relationship and whether or not they will affect your partner.

If you are at the stage in your life where you find dating exciting and fun and you don’t see that changing at all in the future, then you may not get married as you may find that dating answers all of your needs. However, for some people, there comes a time when this is not as fulfilling as it once was. If you no longer want to date, or you can foresee the fact that you will rather find a committed relationship more pleasing, this is a good indication that you will be getting married.

YOU DON’T JUST WANT MEANINGLESS SEX:
One of the best things about being single is the fact that you get to meet different people and if you want to, you can have a lot of sex - with no strings attached if both parties are happy with that arrangement. However, for some, it gets to a point or an age where you don’t want to have meaningless sex, instead, you will want sex to mean something with a significant other. When you get to that stage, it means that you are of a mindset that will put you in a good place to find someone that you want to marry.

YOU CAN WORK OUT TRUST ISSUES:
The key to a successful marriage is trust between two people. However, to get to the stage of marriage or simply being in a place where you are capable of being in a committed relationship with someone, you also need to be open to trusting. When trust problems are present, relationships do not have a balance or a feeling of tranquility. When you are with someone you love, you need to trust them above all others and be open to being vulnerable in front of them without fear of judgment.

If you feel you want to get married but know that you have issues trusting people, it can be a good idea to work through those problems so that you are in the best place possible to find the one you want to marry.

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YOU’RE WITH SOMEONE WHO RESPECTS YOU AND MAKES YOU HAPPY:
Along with trust, knowing implicitly how your partner feels about you is a good way of knowing if you are both in a place where you can see yourselves saying I do to one another. Perhaps one of the key things to have in a relationship is being with someone that respects you and makes you incredibly happy.

This is important as not only does it help put you on that aforementioned same page, but it also means that you can help work on how much you respect and how well you treat one another. If you are ready to say I do, it is essential that you are both happy in each other’s company and that you bring out the best in each other. By no means does this mean your relationship will never have arguments, but you must know how to argue constructively.

YOU AND YOUR PARTNER ARE ON THE SAME PAGE:
It is essential if you are in a relationship with someone that you are both on the same page if you want to marry one another. It is incredibly common for two people who love each other to want different things—particularly when it comes to marriage.

This can be because someone believes in it, whilst the other person does not. But being on the same page also means wanting the same things for your future—be they both wanting successful careers, a family or to live in a certain place. These are all important things that need to be similar or the same for a successful long-term relationship to be capable of saying I do.

YOU WANT TO TAKE THE NEXT STEP WITH YOUR PARTNER:
When you are with a significant other, then one question you should ask yourself when looking at the possibility of getting married is whether you want to take that next step with your partner. If the answer is yes, then you are very happy and committed to each other.

However, if you find when you ask yourself that you don’t want to take things further with them, then perhaps getting married to that person is not quite the right thing for you both. This doesn’t mean that saying I do is totally off the cards for you in the future, it just may not be the thing for you right now.

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YOU DON’T JUST WANT A WEDDING DAY:
Marriage is so much more than a Pinterest board. It’s about a loving relationship where you and your other half support one another in any way you can in a trusting and caring way. If you already know this, and it is that part of the marriage that you want, then you are likely to have a wedding in the future. However, if it is just the wedding that you are after, then it may well be that getting married is not quite for you yet.

YOU RECOGNIZE EFFORT IS MANDATORY:
Everyone loves to say that true love is effortless. That's BS. Maybe the affection is easy at times and the wanting to work on your problems is natural, but the actual relationship work itself is just that—WORK. Make that distinction upfront and be sure you and your partner don't have any delusions about what is expected in the relationship. A marriage will stay afloat only when the effort is made on both sides.

COMMUNICATION IS KEY:
Everyone eggs up at some point, so if you're taking on forever with someone, you must have the ability to communicate well with your partner and whenever there are rough patches, both should be able to face each other and apologize—sincerely, of course. If your romantic counterpart is avoiding difficult discussions or throwing out menacing ultimatums, that should sound some alarms. Marriage is about working as a team to put out the flames when they arise, and one should never threaten to leave when discussions get heated.

YOU CAN DISCUSS EXES WITH MINIMAL DRAMA:
Speaking of fiery conversation topics... We know ex-talk can bring up some icky memories, but it's important to confirm that the person you're with is 1. completely over any old flames and 2. learned from his/her previous relationships. Too many "crazy exes" might indicate the problem may lie with the accuser.

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YOU MAKE LONG TERM PLANS WITH YOUR PARTNER: 
If you are already in a loving relationship with someone, you may know that you will get hitched if you both make plans with each other that are way into the future. People only ever stay in relationships in a meaningful way if they can see a future with the person that they are with. If neither you nor your partner wants to make long-term plans with each other—starting a family, moving in together, or simply shaping a future where you are still both together—it could be better to reevaluate your standings.

YOU'RE STILL DISCOVERING NEW THINGS ABOUT ONE ANOTHER: 
Periods of boredom and monotony are normal, but if you're still uncovering happy surprises about each other after years of being together, that's due to some conscious attempts at engagement on your part, and that's encouraging for the future. Beyond that, you may find yourself being open or eager to try your significant other’s hobbies, something you thought would never happen at the beginning of your relationship.

Before mom!? Book the venue. You're ready.

THERE’S MORE TO MARRIAGE THAN JUST THE WEDDING:
Even if you and your partner check all the boxes, it can be easy to get all wrapped up in the preparations for the big day. Sure, you’re obsessed with the gorgeous sparkler on your finger and can’t wait to go wedding dress shopping. But at the end of the day, your nuptials are just day one of what will hopefully be the rest of your lives together.

It’s good to prepare for your vows and all but try and spend more time and energy planning for the latter. Despite all the pressure of having a picture-perfect wedding, don’t let it get in the way of enjoying this time with your would-be spouse as well as the people closest to both of you. What happens if everything doesn’t go entirely to plan? The two of you can laugh about it on your 20th wedding anniversary.

WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU NEVER GET MARRIED?:
So many people are scared of never getting married, however, it is not something to be afraid of. If you never get married, you will simply have a life where you can concentrate on yourself and your friends. Remember to always love yourself and that it's perfectly fine to put yourself first.

HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU'LL NEVER GET MARRIED?:
It is hard to know for certain if you’ll never get married as you can never say you will never fall in love with a person. However, if you close yourself off to the possibility of marriage, you will greatly diminish your chances of it ever happening due to the pessimistic opinion you have of yourself.

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HOW MANY FIRST MARRIAGES END IN DIVORCE?:
Unfortunately, no one can be sure whether their marriage will last and not end in divorce—despite the very best of intentions. It is thought that the divorce rate of first marriages is about 50%. This means that one in two people will see the breakdown of the marriage of the person that they first married in their lives—it is thought that the rate is dropping, however.

CONCLUSION:
It is important to remember that to marry someone, you need to ensure that you are mentally in the right place to do so. Ultimately, it is best to communicate and learn about each other thoroughly before committing to the long run. If you are with a significant partner already, you will need to both want to marry and know how each other feels.

If you are single, you need to say goodbye to your single ways which can be easier said than done. Either way, if marrying someone is high on your list of priorities, you need to be optimistic that it will happen for you because you are worthy of love and being in a respectful relationship.

by Kimberly Perez